Saturday, May 16, 2009

The Word Gremlin and the Philosophy of Bacon

Ink: What's this big gap in the middle of my philosophy section?

Word Gremlin: Nothing.

Ink: It looks like a gap to me.

Word Gremlin: Gaps are usually made of nothing.

Ink: Well, yes, you miserable little devil, but where are all the philosophy books that are supposed to be inside that gap to make it not a gap at all?

Word Gremlin: I ate them.

Ink: Ate them? Why?

Word Gremlin: Personal edification. Plus, I was hungry.

Ink: I thought you were eating old picture books?

Word Gremlin: I did. They were good.

Ink: Yeah? What does a picture book taste like, anyhow?

Word Gremlin: The usual. Tastes like children.

Ink: ...

Word Gremlin: You can only eat so many.

Ink: Well, now my philosophy section looks crappy. I think you ate Francis Bacon.

Word Gremlin: Yup. Oddly enough, he tasted like bacon. Floppy bacon, with lots of juice. None of that charred stuff your wife eats.

Ink: What about Hobbes?

Word Gremlin: Fish.

Ink: Oh.

Word Gremlin: Big Fish.

Ink: Hey, that's the name of a book.

Word Gremlin: I ate that, too.

5 comments:

Deb Salisbury, Magic Seeker and Mantua-Maker said...

LOL! I am becoming quite fond of your gremlin. I need to find some Bacon to devour, just to see if I agree with his taste.
Happy writing,
Magic Seeker

Bryan Russell said...

Deb, I'd say you could have him... but I don't think he'll leave the store. He's a hungry little beast. What's your home library like? There's always a chance...

Deb Salisbury, Magic Seeker and Mantua-Maker said...

Well, I have a room full of SF/F, one full of dressmaking & costuming books and magazines, one wall of my living room full of reference books, plus various odds and ends of bookshelves scattered through the house. The gremlin would need to wander a bit, though it is a *small* house. Does he have feet? Or is he more like a bookworm?

Bryan Russell said...

He's got feet. Well, claws. Sharp ones. I'll talk to him, though. Maybe he's up for a vacation...

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