Monday, March 15, 2010

The Ludicrosity of Words

Ah, winter. How we love you. And your plagues.

So, here on the outskirts of The City of Windsor, the Zombie Plague has become the Zombie Throat Infection Immune to Antibiotics, which has in turn bred the Zombie Ulcers of the Throat and Mouth. It's like Shaun of the Dead around here. Only without the laughter.

Luckily, this means I get to partake of a bucketful of medication. But the medication amused me, and got me thinking about the above ludicrosity of words. I think these pharmaceutical companies really have to hire me. They need an image boost, and their current copy writers just aren't getting the job done.

Example of note: one of my medications is contained in "a pleasantly flavoured aqueous vehicle". Mmmmmmmm. Yum. I mean, man, I'm thirsty. I could really use a pleasantly flavoured aqueous vehicle right now.

Yes, Apo-Benzydamine, I'm looking at you. And you call yourself pleasant. Where you from? Apotex Inc.? Geez, I'm salivating already. Line that stuff up. Time to party.

I mean... aqueous vehicle? Is it just me or does that sound like some sort of new underwater tank designed for amphibious landings?

So, fellow sophisticates, have you stumbled on any ludicrous uses of words recently?

13 comments:

Elaine 'still writing' Smith said...

I don't think I could find a comment to top your aqueous vehicle.
I hope it drives you to full health, rather than to distraction.

Ink said...

Thanks, Elaine. I'm planning on using aqueous vehicle in all my writing from now on.

And what about that 4-0 drubbing of AC Milan?

Christi Goddard said...

I've not seen anything interesting that really stands out.

I hope you get better soon.

Susan Quinn said...

I'm sorry the Plague is still visiting upon your house! Have you tried repenting? Perhaps after imbibing the aqueous vehicle.

Feel better soon.

Ink said...

Update: "pleasantly flavoured" my ass. Apo-Benzydamine = Demon Witchbrew.

Scott said...

Ink:

Your space monkey comment on Nathan's blog made me laugh out loud (for real!)

Ink said...

Thanks, Scott. But it seemed pretty clear. Cats are great off the dribble. They stay low, with great quickness and burst, and they're sneaky clever going to the hole. Selfish, though. They never want to pass. The monkeys have team play and big-time hops. Good with their hands, too. Gotta go monkey on that one.

Mira said...

ludicrous is a pretty silly word, when you think about it, although that's apt.

I don't know, if I was dealing with what you're dealing with they couldn't put me on ENOUGH medicines. I'd be like, pour that pharmacy into my shopping bag please. Hurry. I don't care if that one's for dandruff, let's give it a go, too.

Here's hoping health visits your household soon, Bryan. :)

And take your medicines, please, they may need better copy writers but as long as they do the job!

Donna Hole said...

Go to bed Bryan! (lol)

No don't; that medication makes you deliriously fun. Your wife must be about ready to send you out to battle space monkeys. She may keep the cat inside though; to protect the baby.

I'll be dreaming about aqueous vehicle's and AC Milan now.

Note to self: don't visit Ink just before bedtime.

........dhole

Tahereh said...

hahahahaaaa.. cute post. tehe.

thanks for sharing!

OfficeGirl said...

I actually just survived a plauge similar to the one you describe.

In answer to you blog post, I have no interersting wording to speak of
but I do like how with Ambien they write, and I qoute "Sleepwalking, and eating or driving while not fully awake, with memory loss for the event, as well as abnormal behaviors such as being more outgoing or aggressive than normal, confusion, agitation, and hallucinations may occur"

This pretty much sums me up everyday without medication. In fact I may put it in my "about me" section on myspace.

Suzannah said...

Yesterday, my son was looking for some challenging words for his spelling list (he's in gr.2), and he came across 'absquatulated,' which means 'to run off in a hurry.'

The example given was, 'My horse has absquatulated.'

For the rest of the day, we kept using it, just for fun. 'You'd better absquatulate to the bathroom!' There was a lot of giggling.

Ink said...

Ooh, that's a good word.

I have to go absquatulate now to partake of an aqueous vehicle.